It's 8:35p.m. and I'm in bed. This month has kicked my butt at work and Polly has been in high speed when I get home so that makes for one tired momma. Note that she is wearing the exact same outfit as last month. It's her dad's favorite so it goes on whenever it's clean. It amazes me each month that passes how different she can look. Day to day I don't notice the subtle changes in her appearance but then a picture just hits me over the head with how fast time is flying. While work has been crazy, I've been doing more to be more present with her each night and weekend. We've been having lots of fun with the weather warming up a bit. Here are a few highlights:
- I can't remember the context but last Friday she said in response to something someone said, "That's not my job."
- Another favorite is when I ask her to hand me something while she's busy and she says, "you get it YOURSELF".
- She also likes to pretend to be busy with something and say, "I'm working". That one makes me feel slightly guilty but I also like the idea of her pretending to be "working" which usually involves Legos and toy power tools.
- She gives the best hugs and kisses.
- I can't get enough of her pure joy when I get home from work or when I pick her up from her babysitter. She yells "MOMMY" and throws her arms up in the air and it melt my heart.
- Being a parent is one of the most complex feelings I've ever had. I love her SO much and die to spend more time with her daily but at the same time there is something so satisfying about driving in my car alone with my own thoughts or settling into my quiet office at the start of the week. Complex is the best way I can describe it. I wish people talked about this more. Maybe there would be less mommy guilt out there killing our self esteem.
- I'm so proud of how independent she is. She has never once cried when I've dropped her off at her babysitter's house. That is a testament to how much she loves being there (thank you Ms. Beth!). It was very hard to drop her off there at 3 months old and head to work (two years ago this week). While I wish I had a longer leave to be with her and believe the maternity practices of this country need to change, I also love how she has her own little life that she gets to explore away from the safety of her parents and that makes me very happy. Now she's getting old enough to tell me to some degree what she did that day and it's so fun to hear what she takes away from her days there. We are lucky.
- She has long and in-depth fake phone conversations that make me realize how annoying I sound on the phone.
- We are still working on the whole potty training thing. I may never quit being shocked by how adult sized poop comes out of a tiny, tiny person. We haven't been very disciplined about it but I'm comforted by a question a wise coworker asked, "Do you know any adults who aren't potty trained?" Nope and hopefully our kid isn't the first in the history of mankind to wear diapers to college.
- She wants to be outside constantly. She loves dirt, rocks and any moving creature outside. She has been helping me water some newly planted flowers and I love seeing how seriously she takes it. It reminds me of helping my grandmother in her garden and flowerbeds in the summer. I loved feeling helpful and I think she loves it too.
- She is fiercely independent and wants to DO IT HERSELF with everything. It makes getting in the car take a lifetime when I'm trying to get to work but she's teaching me a lot about patience and slowing down. I enjoy letting her scale the gigantic car herself and see the pride in little face when she makes it on her own into her seat.
- There is no hurrying a 2 year old so just give up! Yet I try each day and each day I fail.
